IDIO+SYNCRASIES
I ordered a taxi driver not a taxidermy Hey there guy I need a ride What's your address? I'm just outside What's your build and what's your size? Huh? WAH! Are you out of your mind? My brains on fire I can't unwind Pants on the floor when I take my stride I'm like woo ha, woo ha, biddly bup! Wow! URBAN WONDERLAND My mind is ticking over time OH NO! Mind if we take 5? I think I'm gonna *blegh* Don't be alarmed Just lost my head I really took a gamble But it's taken me instead This never should have happened Been done a thousand times I used to hail a taxi Now my hide is on the line, I swеar that… I ORDERED A TAXI DRIVER NOT A TAXIDERMY Aw jeez, pick up the speed Hitting the top gear causе it's time to leave Time tick tockin' while we rocking' on down A couple odd fellows, unconventional clowns Needles n'threads (OH MY) Lacquer n'dead things! When's it gonna end!? Going out for a break, man it's only 12:30 I really need a coffee not a dang taxidermy Oh no, what a shame to make such a mistake (Oh no, this can't be happening to me) Who in their right mind would fill somebody's body parts full of, full of stuffing, y'know? (Nailed to a wall for all to see) Oh, oh no! (Oh what a shame to lose my groove) Somebody help me please! (Just tried to scoot but now I can't move) What? What! Sir, would you please stand still? I ordered a taxi driver not a taxidermy You did not order a taxi driver, you definitely ordered a taxidermy Why would I order a taxidermy instead of a taxi (?) Uh, you have a right (?) wrong number Alright you beautiful specimens you should All be on display. I want to see you, with all of you beauty I want to see you stuffed and preserved, so I can enjoy you all while You stand there doing absolutely nothing at all Ow! Don't be alarmed Just lost my head I really took a gamble But it's taken me instead This never should have happened Been done a thousand times I used to hail a taxi Now my hide is on the
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
I've been CRISP'd (What?) Don't know where I've been Woke up with scales on my skin Look an the mirror (damn!) I need a vacation Had enough of this genetic modification Damn started from the bottom now I'm here I got a rat attached to my %*$# So pour me up a rum & lime And CRISP me baby ONE MORE TIME Alright 30 toes, extra nose, it's all the same to me Got a crab claw right where my legs used to be Can't go back? This is wack dude, don't be like that What do you mean this is set? What kind of fate have I met? Same old me, change me please, been this way too long 200 thousand years I've been singing this song They say D.N.A. is the splice of life So CRISP me baby ONE MORE TIME R.I.P.D.N.A In our CRISPr-fied new world, human genetic modification seems more of a question of "Why"? and "Who in their right mind would do that?" rather than "When?" Imagine you with an extra arm or leg with which to do your tasks with Oh man! Amazing! So come try CRISPr and ask yourself the phrase "What the heck could go wrong?" Get set Break down all your cells "NO NO NO!" Rebuild, now reformed "I'VE CHANGED MY MIND NOW!" TOO LATE! IT'S TIME! LET'S MEET YOUR NEW SELF! Do ya like your new legs, sonny? How about more eyeballs? Oh, two heads? No worries! I'll do it for ya! Damn! 30 toes, extra nose, it's all the same to me Got a crab claw right where my legs used to be Can't go back? This is wack dude, don't be like that What do you mean this is set? What kind of fate have I met? Same old me, change me please, been this way too long 200 thousand years I've been singing this song They say D.N.A. is the splice of life So CRISP me baby ONE MORE TIME
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Bass Well let me tell you now Too much cray up in the planet today Them people out there they treat it like an ashtray It may seem hard but don't lose your head Cause in a few short steps we'll be breakin' that bread Step 1: Jump on your bike Slap a pair of shades on and ride for you life Step 2: Do a backflip or two And soon everyone around you will be Vibin' on your cool moves "What... wait you make it sound cinch BMX tricks won't change an inch" I'll build myself a robot and you'll see how it's done "A BMX Terminator?" That sounds fun! "That's dumb That's just weird I like my life when I'm grinding my gears" You gotta lead by example and soon you will see A cool robot on a bike will set you free Ain't nothing quite like A robot on a bike Ain't nothing quite like A robot on a bike Ain't nothing quite like A robot on a bike YEAH! I'm out here doing whips on my ride With nothing but bolts and screws and wires inside Hit the lip and swing the hangers around 180 360 540 720 OH YEAH! 10 ft flying up in the air While those knuckleheaded dorks all just point and stare Don't fret, you can do it too just like me All eyes on me Hey! I see you snapping that neck Like what you see? Well get a load of this tech Springs in my knees, two jets in my shoes Skidding round berms while I'm blowing a fuse You see, it ain't easy being king of the track People get green and start givin' you smack Oh they just can't deal with the mad skill they lack I'll leave you for dust and you'll be flat on your back BMX Let me hear you say it BMX A c'mon a c'mon BMX A little softer now BMX No fear, leave them behind Ride for your life Steezin' Cruisin' You flick them a wink and pop a superman on your BMX I'm out here doing whips on my ride With nothing but bolts and screws and wires inside Hit the lip and swing the hangers around 180 360 540 720 OH YEAH! 10 ft flying up in the air While those knuckleheaded dorks all just point and stare Don't fret, you can do it too just like me
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
And we're back on politics hour on 200,000 FM. I’m your host, Richard Dick. Here in the studio we have acclaimed guy Mr. Troldhaugen. Now Mr. Troldhaugen, over the years, where would you say that your political compass leans toward? Uh, left wing or right wing...? Ehhhh... CHICKEN WING!
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Why wait for tomorrow When you can have today The best potential ruler for The entire human race He's ticking all the boxes Greets you with a smile With words that soar around the world He's politically agile "Come on y'all! Just sign the dotted line! That's right you're doing fine!" "But sir, I can't read… I don't know what I'm ticking?" "What's the matter son? Bok bok! Are you chicken!?" "Just follow my lead" (ah huh) "Look at why I do" (errr…) "It's easy everybody" "Now cock-a-doodle-doo!" Ballet box full of feathers and ink Pave the way for a galactic space trip To the stars in the hull of mechanical rooster THE FLOCK HAS FLOWN THE COOP Y'ALL! Unnnghh! What's this on my head now? Is it some sort of device that's shows reality? No I swear this ain't home Free range lies all up in my dome Starting to forget what the heck I'm here for Chicken Lord mentioned something about us being forced To run treadmills to fuel this steel space mobile Or he'll make us squeal for real? The coop is out there Roam your pastures The coop is out there The coop is out the now shoot your blasters The coop is out there Who's your master? Now shoot your blasters Oh yeah yeah yeah YEAAHHHH! Across the galaxy Look out for my Kentucky fried laser beam Oh yeah I'm the king of the clutch OOH YEAH Ballet box full of feathers and ink Pave the way for a galactic space trip To the stars in the hull of mechanical rooster THE FLOCK HAS FLOWN THE COOP Y'ALL!
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Got my hands up against the wall You make me feel like a gecko Girl you look so fine you got me snappin' my necko Mambo Mambo Let me give you a spanko Lady, are you gonna be my Binko Banko? (Binko Banko? Is that all I am to you? I assure you I'm a lizard through and through So shut your forked tongue 'coz this ain't news to me Don't treat me like I am some wedded newt-to-be) Babe I got this cold blood Warm my heart with your tongue You got that touch that I crave Now let's canoodle inside your cave Oh, soon you'll see Nocturnal instincts will set you free Be into it, don't think no but say go 'Coz all I wanna do is Binko Banko Drop down Shake it round Make me slither Yeah girl, tail curled Right around my trigger Big eyes, open wide Don't you worry Get moist with me Wide eyes, flat pads Longest tongue yeah, I'm so bad Crawling up against the wall Shed that skin yeah, I make you crawl Ms. Slimy, come on try me Show you all the moves I know Don't leave me hanging on this glass Cause it takes two to tango Oh baby, it's you I want to please Under them doors and cracks, I squeeze Wriggling to this beat Look at how my eye balls sheen Slippery glistenin' All reptilian Watch me bounce now Just like silicone Mambo Mambo MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO Lady, are you gonna be my Binko Banko? Mambo Mambo Let me give you spanko Mambo Mambo Take that ass to the banko MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO Lady, are you gonna be my Binko Banko? Mambo Mambo Let me give you spanko Mambo Mambo Take that ass to the banko MAMBO MAMBO (Ooh!) MAMBO MAMBO (Oh yeah!) Lady, are you gonna be my Binko Banko? Mambo Mambo Take your ass to the banko Mambo Mambo Let me give you spanko MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO MAMBO Lady, are you gonna be my Binko Banko?
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Day after day, it creeps up 'til you stay "Oh man what can I do to feel normal again?" Well I'm here to calm your nerves, take a load off your mind Let me course through your body 'til your troubles unwind Squeeze in under your skin And let the magic begin Feels so good come on this has to be sin Oh yeah, now baby feel that flow Ain't no one can resist my flow Tune out no stress now Just let it all slide No more pain inside your brain just ride on this high for life Nothing compares to this Oh no no nothin' at all Make you feel like you're the best in show 'Coz ain't no one can resist my flow What's this feelin'? Losin' control of my breathin' Oh, take my blues away Legs and arms numbing I can't feel my toes Put all the world on hold yeah While I'm becoming comatose Feel that flow pumpin' Direct into my veins I can feel it takin' over Take those hands off the reins Here it goes again Cruisin' it now It's like you're ridin' a cloud And it ain't even illegal man, it's medically sound Like I said, it's all gravy who could ever resist But your mind is so fried you can't explain what this is A hundred hours, maybe more Time has flown out the door Your body may be trashed at least it doesn't feel sore Yeah you never felt like this before Oh you never felt like this before What's this feelin'? Losin' control of my breathin' Oh, take my blues away Legs and arms numbing I can't feel my toes Put all the world on hold, yeah While I'm becoming comatose Feel that flow pumpin' Direct into my veins I can feel it takin' over Take those hands off the reins Oh, here it goes again Legs and arms numbing I can't feel my toes Put all the world on hold, yeah While I'm becoming comatose Feel that flow pumpin' Direct into my veins I can feel it takin' over Take those hands off the reins Here it goes again Legs and arms numbing I can't feel my toes Put all the world on hold, yeah While I'm becoming comatose Feel that flow pumpin' Direct into my veins I can feel it takin' over Take those hands off the reins Here it goes again
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Uhhh... hello? I don't know what to say about this shit, but I don't know what to do now, and I'll never ever knew if we have access to it, so I don't know what to do now, and I don't even know if we have access to it, so I don't know what to do now, and I don't even have to exercise a little! Well, I can go for the next twelve years of my work express with my new home — Uhhh... what?
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
We getting all up in your brow game Dark-web vapors seeping deep into your airways Lurking while you surfin' We'll try not to disturb ya Creepin' up just like a jaguar Break those legs 'til you're fetal again Let all the silicone trends fill the holes in your head And while you suck in that gut and you stick out ya butt Let the shutter go snap, you're famous WAH WAH You bait those clicks But under that filter you stomach is sick And you throw up Say them prayers Unfriend and pretend as you Hit that share Again and again With that vacant stare Let's see them chins hit the floor JAW DROP JAW DROP We're that itch on your neck, you feel? Feeding' you lead, don't question it We'll keep greasing that hamster wheel Busting' your head, like you was dead Yeah you know we bring that fried-minded vibe That's the deal when you come and ride on this rhythm Beat that dead horse idea, then scoop out ya eyes 'Coz ain't nobody need to see the way we straight hypnotizin' Bring out the champagne and broads There's no way at all you won't come back asking for more But your brains all clouded and you fall to the floor You didn't know what you was in for (Drop, drop) Wind back the time when your head was still right And the shame and the fear didn't leak out your ears Now your eyes getting square and the stank fills the air Slide down the fiber Say them prayers Unfriend and pretend as you Hit that share Again and again With that vacant stare Let's see them chins hit the floor JAW DROP JAW DROP We're that itch on your neck, you feel? Feeding' you lead, don't question it We'll keep greasing that hamster wheel Busting' your— LIKE YOU WAS DEAD
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Tiny town Sun's going down Eyes are getting heavy When up rolls a Chevy In a front (in a front) Irregular hunk Quickly now, switch in and out And leave without a trace Rolls up into the place What is up with his face? I'm not the only one in this "room for one" Better call the desk in case Here we go again Another mannequin Going round the bend My brain is gonna spin Oh I could never be as dull or lame as he Won't someone help me please IS THIS GUY A FOE OR A FRIEND? I'm squirming, concerning, don't hurt him! Oh, I've never seen someone so shady before Maybe I should call the law? I'm the only one in, with this bottle of gin Why's there ash on the floor!? Never eats and sleeps Watches the T.V Arms straight by his side And doesn't need to pee Ain't been down all day Just a static haze I feel that yearning For some real company Here we go again Another mannequin Going round the bend My brain is gonna spin Oh I could never be as dull or lame as he Won't someone help me please IS THIS GUY A FOE OR A FRIEND? I'm squirming, concerning, don't hurt him! Oh, I've never seen someone so shady before Maybe I should call the law? I'm the only one in, with this bottle of gin Why's their ash on the floor!? Never eats and sleeps Watches the T.V Arms straight by his side And doesn't need to pee Ain't been down all day Just a static haze I feel that yearning For some real company
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
Busted rusted set of clamps Beakers cracking on their racks Where did I leave that glue? Making 1 from 2 Something squirming Wriggling, turning Under that microscope yeah Since when was that jelly floatin'? I've been at it for hours So won't you show me what I need to know In that vial's the power, baby I really hope it doesn't blow! The genome can be defined as an organism's complete set of D.N.A., including all of its genes Each genome contains all of the information needed to build and maintain that organism More than 3 billion base pairs arе contained in the human genomе Break it down now! What!? What's going on!? I've been at it for hours So won't you show me what I need to know In that vial's the power baby I really hope it doesn't blow Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle! Whoever could have know That this little experiment was something all home grown Genome in a bottle! I can't believe my eyes Mixing chems under my house could have lead to human kind! I've been at it for hours So won't you show me what I need to know In that vial's the power baby I really hope it doesn't blow Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle Genome in a bottle...
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026
It's all just a matter of perspective, man You just do what you want, when you can It's all about perspective, man Go on and take a little time to sit and stare Paints off without a worry or care It's all about perspective, man And if a giant asteroid fell out space And socked you one straight in the face Just keep on smiling the whole day through It's all just a matter of perspective, man You just do what you want, when you can It's all about perspective, man...
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Jun 30, 2026