Heavy Metal Rules

What's your philosophy on life? Oh it's me It's sucks shit! Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules All that punk shit sucks, it doesn't belong in this world. It belongs on fuckin' mars, man. What the hell is punk shit? And Madonna can go to hell as far as I'm concerned, she's a dick I mean seriously, heavy metal definitely rules Twisted Sister, Judas Priest, Dokken, Ozzy, Scorpions, they all rule

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

Mom and dad are out of town Call  the whores it's going down Let's  all fuck until the dawn Fornicate on the neighbors lawn Let's get high tonight Let  the brain cells fry tonight Baby  let's get high Snort the coke and pass the bong Crank  the new Steel Panther song I've got shrooms and ecstasy Don't be shy they're gluten free! Let's get high tonight Let  the brain frells sigh tonight Baby let's get high Don't worry 'bout your parents Cuz they ain't here tonight Don't worry 'bout the law Cuz there ain't a cop in sight Don't worry 'bout the future Cuz all we got is now Don't worry 'bout getting high as fuck Cuz I'm gonna show you how I'm gonna show you how I'm gonna show you how 30 pizzas, a bottle of Dom Amex card please and thank you mom Girls lined up all on their knees Don't jizz on the sofa please Let's get high tonight Let the brain cells fry tonight Baby let's get high tonight

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

(Verse 1) I fell in love with someone sweet and pure But you became the world's biggest whore I went away for a few weeks or more You fucked more dudes than I fucked girls on the tour How can it be? You got me beat I'm not the only one who loves to cheat (Chorus) Doesn't matter what ya do or where ya go You're always gonna be a ho. Oh! Don't care where ya live or who ya know You're always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh! (Verse 2) I never knew I could feel quite so sick I Kissed your mouth and tasted Satchel's dick I ran away, went to my Grandpa's farm I saw your name tattooed on my Grandpa's arm Is there no man you haven't laid? Has your vagina never seen the shade? (Chorus) Doesn't matter what ya do or where ya go You're always gonna be a ho. Oh! Don't care if your Dad is Russell Crowe You're always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh! (Bridge) This could be our love's biggest test Baby I don't care if your a ho Just tell me I'm the best (Guitar Solo) (Interlude) Doesn't matter if you're hot Doesn't matter if your cold Doesn't matter if you got your vagina plated in gold Doesn't matter if you live so long you're covered in mold You're always gonna be a ho It's a truth, so I am told (Chorus) Doesn't matter what ya do or where ya go You're always gonna be a ho. Oh! You're always gonna rub my dick and it's gonna grow You're always gonna be a ho. Ohhhhh! (Outro) You're my favorite garden tool Out in the shed behind the swimming pool You're a ho You're a fuckin' ho

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

Pick up your clothes, take the trash out Is that really all that love is about? Give me a back rub, snuggle after sex This kind of stuff will turn you into my ex Ain't gonna do the things you want me to do You think ''I'm the boss''? I've got some news for you I'm not your bitch, I'm not your bitch Why you gotta treat me like one? I'm not your bitch, I'm not your bitch Why you gotta ruin my fun? Start the laundry, clean all the sinks I'm in a quandary and it fucking stinks Time may be here to lay down the law Don't make me beat you with my Panther paw Find someone else to walk right into your trap You've worn out your welcome, I'll be taking a nap I'm not your bitch, I'm not your bitch Why you gotta be so dumb? I'm not your bitch, I'm not your bitch I'm only here to make you cum Aw, wait for me, baby!

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

YEAH..... Stupid fuckin' bitch in the fast-lane almost hit my car Checkin' her fuckin' Snapchat on her motherfucking phone Tried to wave an officer down, he was on Instagram Fuck Everybody! Everybody can suck my dick! Stinky fuckin' dude on the airplane didn't wash himself Smelled like I was trapped inside the carcass of a whale Flight from LA to Toronto he sat in my fuckin' row Fuck Everybody! Everybody can suck my dick! Fuck Everybody! Everybody can suck my dick! Stepped into some dog shit Coming home last night, in my fucking driveway And I donʼt even own a dog Pick up after your mastiff you lazy fucking cunt Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Everbody Everybody can suck my dick Everybody can suck my fuckin' dick Everybody can lick my motherfuckin' balls Fuck everybody! Everybody can suck my motherfucking dick Went to my local Starbucks Ordered my usual fare Double vanilla latte with whipped cream and cinnamon sprinkles The dude three people behind me in line Got his Frappuccino first Fuck everybody! Fuck everybody! Fuck everybody! Fuck everybody! Everybody can suck my dick! Fuck everbody! Everybody can suck my motherfuckin' dick EVERYONE CAN SUCK MY FUCKIN' DICK!

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

Couldn't make no money as a singer Didn't  seem to get too far So  I sell pot brownies and Vicodin From the back seat of my car Movin' back to Chicago Gonna  rest my achin' head Spotify  took my last 2 cents And the butter for my bread Gene  Simmons said it Rock and roll is dead Rock and roll is dead I never did it for the money I  only did it to get laid But I can't buy shots for the ladies If there's no way to get paid Now I can't make money on my good looks Can't make it on applause So I sell nose beers to the kiddos And thumb my own nose at the laws But I'm never ever gonna stop playing Even though rock and roll ain't paying Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules Heavy metal rules And everybody else can suck my dick Gonna make my money stealing hub caps And selling black tar on the streets Taking handbags from old ladies While they respond to Trumpy's Tweets Apple came to town a ringing A death knell for the band If I can't make money selling records I'm gonna make it any way I can And I'm gonna keep on rocking your ass As long as I'm on the right side of the grass Cuz heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Madonna - she's a dick!) Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (That punk shit belongs on Mars!) Heavy metal rules, heavy metal rules (Dokken, Van Halen, they all fucking rule!) Heavy metal rules And everybody else can suck my fucking dick

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

Caught you with your hand in the cookie jar Shoving cocks in your cookie in the back of your car You told me it was never gonna happen again But before you fucked my uncle and my ex best friend You gotta have the weenie, so why pretend? You're a sneaky little bitch Shoulda known it right from the start You're a sneaky little bitch Your intention was fucking my heart Right in the ass Right in the ass Shoulda seen the signs when you came home late Naked in a limo at a quarter to eight, in the morning Said you didn't fuck him but I think I know The kid we got at home has a big Afro Same color as your ex, Lemonjello You're a sneaky little bitch I could tell by the screen on your phone You're a sneaky little bitch Dicks of all of the guys that you've boned Now I finally have a clue And I know what you can do But there's something you don't know I'm a sneaky fucker too All the anal pics you took For my private jacker book I've been posting them tonight To your church's new website Caught you like a fish with a worm in your mouth Taking Peter North on a trip down south All your friends were laughing like a bunch of cunts Sure I probably came off like a total dunce Wish that I could give you herpes more than once You're a sneaky little bitch Shoulda listened to all of my friends You're a sneaky little bitch With your sneaky texts that you send You're a sneaky little bitch Shoulda known it right from the start You're a sneaky little bitch Oh a sneaky, you're a sticky little shark

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

Sometimes it's hard When all the girls want to fuck you So you fuck em once Bu they just keep coming back And there's other girls And your dick wants someone new But the bitches you fucked before Are cock blocking you Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Putting our wangs Into sweet poontangs Making em gush In the back of the bus Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Sometimes it sucks To have a cock so thick and juicy When the girls get a taste of it They never want to give it up So they suck off the drum tech Just to get back stage But we don't want no sludge piggy Who's covered in roadie jizz Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Making em hurt While we make them squirt Making em squeal Making em feel Like leaving their husbands, oh yeah Gods of pussy Gods of pussy We go to work And we make them twerk After the show Fucking 17 hoes That's when you know Your a god of pussy Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Making em scream Making em cream Making em bleed Making em feed Right from your hand You're in the land of the Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Greasing our poles Filling their holes We're in a band So their dudes understand We're gods of pussy Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Gods of pussy Give em a slap Give em the clap They guzzle our jizz It is what it is We're gods of pussy Gods of pussy!

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026

I don't need a crystal ball To tell me that I'll be Dead from liver failure Just wait around and see Don't need acupuncture To rid me of my pain I've got pharmaceuticals And no plans to abstain Cuz I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling Cuz I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling I don't need confession To absolve me of my sins They're as much a part of me As a fish is to his fins I don't need the government Or a social safety net That ponzi scheme will crash someday If it hasn't started yet And I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling And I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling If I come across As if I am complaining It's cuz you're pissing down my back And you're telling me it's raining Maybe you believe the bullshit Or maybe you're just lying But I ain't buying I don't need conspiracies Or ufology To distract me from my happy life Of mediocrity I've got a labradoodle And I've got the gift of song And when that's not enough I take a ripper off my bong And I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling I ain't buying, I ain't buying what you're selling

Submitted by The Void — Feb 22, 2026