Vol

The mob are ravenous, they're thirsting for my blood Hunting for me nightly; "Ready the stake – fetch the wood." This poisoned chalice, once tight within my grip The unruly horde cries out: "Comedy metal is fucking shit." The only reviews worth reading are scrawled on the back of toilet doors Gnashing teeth grinding bones to powder then to be snorted on the sink by the rabble's whores This pit of vipers is always hissing with contempt Invalid artform Please try again Invalid artform Please try again Invalid artform Please try again This is your last chance One more attempt That's it you're locked out, you're never getting in Wipe that smirk right off your face – that shit-eating grin Insidious imbeciles mocking a carefully crafted code Sin and death and rage is all we've ever known I'm so tired Is this my burden, is this my Hell to bear? A severe inability to take anything seriously Forever cursed to be the clown I'm the wry smile at the funeral, the selfie with the mushroom cloud The only reviews worth reading are hateful comments in online forums Chewed up and spat out by the algorithm's doormen Trade in your soul for content and monetise your dreams This world will burn to blackened ash but think of all the memes Everything is funny if you take enough steps back Everything is funny if you hold your breath for long enough Are you not entertained? Where is my fortune? Where's my fame? You cannot possibly hate me any more than I hate myself Is this my burden, is this my hell to bear? A severe inability to take anything seriously Forever cursed to be the clown I'm the wry smile at the funeral, the selfie with the mushroom cloud Should I carve out my own path or go by the handbook? You shouldn't judge a book by its cover Don't you dare judge this book by its cover It's all a fucking joke It's all a joke, and no one's laughing but me Maybe that's all that matters And maybe that's the point

Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Apr 25, 2025

The barren streets outside the gates hum with distant groans The world of man has gone to waste, little did we know Inside we carelessly rejoice and bask in music's glow We raise a toast to a life divine and vow to never let this feeling go The horde craves our living human flesh "Remove the head. Destroy the brain." They gnaw on the entrails of the dead "The streets are stained with grim remains." Spine-chilling terror from the crypt "Remove the head. Destroy the brain." "I thought you said you gave them the slip?" "Mankind cries out in bitter pain." Beyond the grave a new horror has awakened to bring this wretched race to a rotten end Nightmares manifested through the recently infected with the dearly departed animated once more The fences breached; onward they roam. Dead behind the eyes Mindlessly they're marching on, but who are we to criticise? A sea of chains and baggy jeans flood this ill-lit room The man with dreadlocks on the stage bellows out a unique tune Beyond the grave a new horror has awakened to bring this wretched race to a rotten end Nightmares manifested through the recently infected with the dearly departed animated once more A doomed humanity clings to hope Meanwhile the reaper ties the rope Stench of the coffin, rank and foul Hell's overran, now hear them howl You've got red on you and there's a living dead girl in the garden Beyond the grave a new horror has awakened to bring this wretched race to a rotten end Nightmares manifested through the recently infected, so we'll have a pint and wait for this to all blow over

Submitted by Immortal — Apr 25, 2025

"Look at that hunky neck." In a gloomy, dim lit pub I sit and wait while you get a round in "I'll have what you have, George I'll have a pint of 'Amber Smashed Face' ale." Night fall descending We raise up our glass Madness unending Your words are like mass …And we'll talk about Warcraft, and we'll talk about sports And don't get me started on Cannibal Corpse In a gloomy, dim lit pub I watch you headbang for ten straight minutes The bar staff are quite concerned "It's alright love, because he always does this." Is this the same place? This evening is a blur Eyes glazed; I can't feel my face My words start to slur We're neck deep in sin As the sweetest of poisons are poured down our throat The fiend that's within Carving a path of acute self-destruction We're neck deep in sin Pure chaos is spawned from an unquenchable thirst The fiend that's within Taste the waters of oblivion Drink up The. Time. To. Drink. Is. Motherfucking. Now. The time to drink is motherfucking now …And we'll talk about fishing, and we'll talk about grabbing machines And don't get me starting on Monstrosity Last orders have been called, I slump and wait while you get a round in "I'll have what you have, George." I've had enough but I can't be stopped "Look at that hunky neck."

Submitted by Warbringer — Apr 25, 2025

Enchanted by his elegant presence Transfixed by the flailing limbs Spellbound by the madness of this erratic waltz Engrossed by the majestic jig He moves in his own way He's grinding every day A one-man mosh devouring the stage He moves in his own way He's grinding every day Free-form frolicking on full display It looks like he's being chased by a swarm of invisible wasps Somewhere between a power walk and a light jog Like a dance at the end of the night when you've had too much to drink Like treading quicksand – move fast before you sink Volatile outbursts manifested in movement Let the music flow… And dance like Barney fucking Greenway From this act I'm rendered speechless My thoughts have all but stopped What is this that stands before me, is it a man or a god? My legs begin to tremble My entire body shakes I'm possessed by the harsh noise Propping up the bar I stand and watch in amazement As I transcend to a higher plane This show is pure entertainment A shot of serotonin straight to my brain I'm in awe from the very first note This is my cure, my antidote To the sickness of everyday strife Napalm Death restoring my faith in life It looks like he's being chased by a swarm of invisible wasps Somewhere between a power walk and a light jog Like a dance at the end of the night when you've had too much to drink Like treading quicksand – move fast before you sink From this act I'm rendered speechless My thoughts have all but stopped What is this that stands before me, is it a man or a god? My legs begin to tremble My entire body shakes I'm possessed by the harsh noise

Submitted by Warbringer — Apr 25, 2025

The leaves beneath their feet crunch and crack like broken bones A sinister wind tears through the trees, this forest starts to moan The branches twist like sprawling limbs, blotting out the sun This darkened wood will be their graves, there's nowhere left to run Beneath the gloomy shrubs the ground is torn asunder An interdimensional gate into another world Teeming with unearthly horrors beyond comprehension They're drawn into the light, like a moth unto a flame Here is where he dwells, within this realm Occupied by the remnants of Hell Destined to reign forever more Fred Durst the darkest of lords The dead horizon is littered with blackened clouds and electric storms From overhead a horde of ravenous demon bats begins to swarm Remains flow through the rivers as ghoulish figures feast on flesh A plane unblessed by sunlight, where gods now fear to tread Shadows from his pitch-black spires spread across this cursed land An all-enveloping fog now surrounds this rotten earth Past stray debris and ash-like spores, he's out there in the distance A once-human lich king standing effortlessly tall Here is where he dwells, within this realm Occupied by the remnants of Hell Destined to reign forever more Fred Durst the darkest of lords Misanthropic creature blinded by an ageless rage Through cosmic rifts of time and space he inflicts a sonic reign At the dawn of a millennia he rears his blood-red cap Determined to disrupt with his obstreperous brand of metal-rap Genre-neutral anthems of whimsy and of bile Elitists claim to guard the gate whilst living in denial This nihilistic jester spins his lurid tales of bilge Behind blue eyes, all things must die, a prophecy fulfilled "It's time for your suffering to end."

Submitted by Sexy Gargoyle — Apr 25, 2025

Forgive me for I know not what I've done I listen to slam, and it's made my brain dumb Trust me, this aint no sick, twisted joke Your nan saw the band name and started to choke But on the bright side it could've been so much worse It could have been my long sleeve of Butchered at Birth Oh yeah, this could have been so much worse It could have been the sweatshirt I bought from Aborted A sartorial faux pas A grave miscalculation of this party's dress code Eyes like daggers are tearing through me I grabbed the first shirt I could find. I'm sorry I was lost Adrift in a sea of blackened garments Mindlessly reaching out into the darkness I was lost Adrift in a sea of blackened garments Then finally, I found one A shirt. From the wardrobe Forgive me for I know not what I've done If I would have realised, I wouldn't have come Trust me, this was an honest mistake I'm awfully sad to have spoiled the charade But on the bright side it could've been so much worse It could have been my zip-up from Decrepit Birth Oh yeah, this could have been so much worse It could have been my tank top from Infant Annihilator I'm casting no aspersions But I feel like I'm a burden To this hollow act of vanity That's driven by pure vacuity I'm trying to act amicably But the cynic deep within me screams That this is nothing more than some self-indulgent narcissism Subjected to revealing! What have we done to suffer this? Subjected to revealing! Nothing but egregious piss Hurry up and pop that balloon! Pop it!

Submitted by Finntroll — Apr 25, 2025

Worship the altar How can I be metal when I feel so sad? I can't camouflage my feelings like the pattern on these trousers Cover these wounds like patches on a jacket I'll just drown out this world with an abrasive racket These long, cold, dark nights Eternal winter skies As tears mount behind my weary eyes Naked, afraid, and alone With heart harder than stone Lock away these damned old bones How can I be metal when I feel so shit? I'll crowd kill depression in this dopamine mosh pit Anxiety is neither Kvlt nor Trve Just call me Knocked Loose cos I'm A Different Shade of Blue How can I be metal when I feel so low? Inside I'm as empty as your band's hometown show Intrusive thoughts telling me that I'm a poser Cut the music. Kill the lights. Shows over. Oh, these long, cold, dark nights Eternal winter skies As tears mount behind my weary eyes Naked, afraid, and alone With heart harder than stone Lock away these damned old bones Plunging down into the black Sink fast Drown slow Sink fast beneath the waves, the water filling up your lungs Drifting down into the dark abyss Enter the numbing nothingness A sting of melancholy searing through my brain As a torn and bleeding heart cries out in bitter pain Encumbered with grief, the black dog at my door You cannot surrender in a never-ending war Through the fog of despair in the forest of gloom Swollen with guilt, clutch a funeral bloom A husk of a man stands before you, doomed Bereft of feeling Bereft of meaning Worshipping at the altars of sadness

Submitted by Cyberwaste — Apr 25, 2025

Get on your dancing shoes, you sexy swine Fill up that cup cos It's time to walk the line Shirtless as fuck. It's time to strut your stuff Glenn Allen Danzig, you're looking pretty buff It's Friday night under the disco lights Pulsating rhythms radiating sheer delight Our eyes collide and bodies intertwine Let's raise a toast to an evening so divine The night is young and this Misfit's full of life Give him half a chance and he'll probably bone your wife Lifting in the day and dancing in the dark With you between my arms, I will never come to harm We've got to keep this moving. Non-stop, incessant grooving If the church could see us now, they'd be very disapproving But we care not, time is short, and we only get one shot So, load the gun and shoot to kill, give everything we've got It's time to dance, dance, dance, my darling "The only thing they've got on tap is fucking Carling" Shirtless and buff. Starting to push your luck Glenn Allen Danzig begins to run amok This alternate club is bursting at the seams I'm jiving with goth Elvis, this surely is a dream? Some guy is pushing past and stepping on my toes A soon-defused exchange but it takes two to tanGO! He's got two left feet and he's dragging his heels, yet he still gets a ten from Glenn He's got two left feet and he's dragging his heels, yet he still gets a ten from Glenn Eight pints of snakebite and black in my system I can't believe the DJ refused to play 'Mother'. Fucker. Let's dance From out of the shadows, we sprawl Basking in the glow of a winter's moon We delinquents of the night All singing, all Danzig You should have stopped me before I got carried away In the heat of the moment, our heartbeats combine And count us down to that dreaded sunrise You should have stopped me before I got carried away An evening of pleasure with godless intent We'll fucking sleep when we're dead

Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Apr 25, 2025

I'm vanilla in bed, hun Missionary for mains with tender cuddle deserts I get the job done There's pleasure to be had but I doubt you'll come O.S.D.M? Don't mean to kink shame but I'm not into that stuff I'm just a normal guy No whips or chains or shoving things up my… Candles lit Scattered petals Towel down Baby oil Heavy petting during softcore erotica Entombed is on the speakers We're bumping uglies now I'm fast as fuck, boy! Chainsaw guitars in my ears will have me lasting for hours Growl in my ear, love To the sweet words of Chris Barnes, I'll eat you back to life O.S.D.M! The raw brutality slowly pounding into my ears I'm like a man possessed Seven Churches won't save you from my sexual prowess Dripping sweat Switch positions Morbid angles Blessed are the THICC In the bedroom, I am your War Master This will make you wet… Like an Ever Flowing Stream They hear me coming a mile away They hear me coming a mile away EURGH I wanna slide into your osDMs I wanna slide into your osDMs

Submitted by Corpse Defiler — Apr 25, 2025

Live, Laugh, Lars Adorned on the walls Inside of my shrine these three words they are scrawled I'm just a fan, Lars I'm just a fan, Lars Shake my hand! Shake my hand! What a pleasure it is to be shaking your hand No, stay! Don't go! Lulu was great! Please, don't go! Hit The Lights! And step inside my temple of lunacy Nowhere to hide I like Dave Lombardo, too Not as much as you He's losing the battle for wall space Will you come and see my brother-in-law next weekend? Bet you can't guess where he lives. Go on, have a guess. Leeds! In the throes of infatuation, Some Kind of Monster once Trapped Under Ice Through The Frayed Ends of Sanity, a Frantic obsession has started to gnaw It's Sad But True, but it's fans like us that make you what you are I know you don't agree but look at my tattoo. It took 14 hours; I fainted 3 times Glory Be! Enter madman Bearing hot tea inside of an arielator Napster were in the wrong I'd sue them too! Scum, subhuman scum Fandom! Imprisoning me, all that I see, absolute horror I cannot live without you; I cannot die without you by my side In the throes of infatuation, Some Kind of Monster once Trapped Under Ice Through The Frayed Ends of Sanity, a Frantic obsession has started to gnaw From the depth of depravity, an Unforgiven plan hatched into form Lured into my unrelenting headlock, you'll soon Fade to Black forevermore… Let's do an interview, you be me and I'll be you Wearing a mask of your face Don't be scared As I smear your name in excrement all over these walls Dancing through the fields of delusions, hand in hand, we're freed from the shackles of reality A sick and twisted illusion manifesting as an overzealous devotee Come with me and we'll both be free Can we be friends? Can we be best friends? I'm just a fan, Lars. Your biggest fan!

Submitted by MetalElf — Apr 25, 2025

Nothing means anything, we're all just on our own The dates I came and left this plane are etched in marble stone Each moment, each memory, each facet of my life Condensed into a speech to help console my grieving wife Soon to be forgotten, my flesh rotting away All of my struggles, my woes, pulled into the undertow An existence swallowed whole by the vast oceans of time My whole life I spent waiting and it all just passed me by We are imprisoned by fear, but only if we let it When we're gone, we're gone People mourn and then carry on The reality of life is that we're all doomed right from the start From the cradle to the grave, the Reapers scythe we can't escape Hand in hand with all our friends as we descend into the bowels of Hell, we'll sing: "None of this will matter in the end." Together we descend, hand in hand we'll sing: "None of this will matter in the end." It's all pointless Totally pointless It's fucking pointless When my time comes, what will I have done? What will I leave behind? What will my legacy be? I doubt I'll even be a name on a fucking bench None of this will matter in the end That's beautiful, don't you see? How wonderful that everything is all just so inconsequential No watchful gods, no great master plan Just a happy accident that's floating aimlessly around How liberating The ebbs and the flows The dizzying highs and the crippling lows The human experience that we call life Just take a deep breath and enjoy the ride Just enjoy the ride

Submitted by Celtic Frost — Apr 25, 2025