We Couldn't Think of a Title!
-*sigh* Hey guys, ok seriously, we gotta come up with an ablum title here -I got one, I got one, how about, The Flesh Eating Rollerskate -Hahahaha, oh man. No, no -Well what about, I Am Staring....At YOU -No, just, I Am Staring -No no no no no no no, here you go, If You Add Water, Nothing Will Happen! (giggle) Get it? -How about we call it, I'm Going To Kill You Guys! -Sorry man. That's not very funny -Well it's hard to be funny when Robbie's over here playing with himself!
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
(Intro) What the hell are you doing? Dude, I'm scratching my balls In a crowd With no escape Is when I feel My privates wake I've got to find Some privacy Or they will see Me scratching me My balls itch They're itching, I gotta scratch 'em Way down low My balls are a ball of fire My balls itch They're itching, I gotta scratch 'em Way down low My balls are a ball of fire Irritation Toleration Scrotum itching Leaves me bitching Can't endure this Epidermis Scrotum itching Leave me bi--- Tension builds There's got to be A way to end My agony Pockets deep Where no one sees I find the keys To my relief My balls itch They're itching, I gotta scratch 'em Way down low My balls are a ball of fire My balls itch They're itching, I gotta scratch 'em Way down low My balls are a ball of fire Irritation Toleration Scrotum itching Leaves me bitching Can't endure this Epidermis Scrotum itching Leave me bi---
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
My car is a PIECE OF SHIT! I wanna drive you off a cliff Watch you crash into a ravine for the things you did to me You STUPID CAR! I wanna make myself a pipe bomb Blow your damn engine back to hell where I know you're from PIECE OF CRAP! You aren't even worth the tow To a junkyard or a place where you'd sit and lay to waste I WISH YOU'D DIE! Oh nevermind, you always do Could you tell me how much longer it will be until I'm rid of you? I wish that you would just get hit by lightning, or something My confidence in you is sold with every part I buy I guess I'm just a sucker with a lemon So pucker up and kiss another paycheck goodbye You leak more than a newborn baby I change your oil all the time but still you need some more Your fluid puddles come in assorted colors Such wonderful variety of problems galore Will there be a time, when I know I can drive Without my car breaking down? And will I ever see, it start consistently Without the pain and the suffering? Stupid fucking car, stupid fucking car (DIE!) Stupid fucking car, stupid fucking car (DIE!) Stupid fucking car, stupid fucking car (DIE!) My car is a PIECE OF SHIT! I oughta give you a swift kick In the muffler, in the tire, or wherever I desire You STUPID CAR! You never get me very far when You decide driving to the store is a mortal sin PIECE OF CRAP! I guess you want a piece of me Since you're leaving all your pieces in the middle of the street You HEAP OF JUNK! I don't know what I'm gonna do I just hope that I don't have to take another day of driving you I swear you must be older than my grandma, and she's dead The fact you run at all is quite a mystery to me Your miles are approaching seven digits May God have mercy on the soul that's holding the key I guess I'm just a little angry But for some reason, getting stranded kinda chaps my hide You probably think I'm slightly overreacting Has your car ever made you think about suicide? Will there be a time, when I know I can drive Without my car breaking down? And will I ever see, it start consistently Without the pain and the torment? Will there be a time, when I know I can drive Without my car breaking down? And will I ever see, (music slows to stop) it start consist...? What the...? (Car starting) Come on... (Car starting) Gimme a break! (Car starts running for a moment) Ah (Car breaks down) All right! You piece of SHIT! (Smashing noises) DIE! (Smashing noises) DIE! Stupid car
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Narrator: What would YOU do for a Death Burger?! Drive-Thru: Hi, welcome to Sonic! Can I take your order please? Customer 1: Yes! I would like a... Death Burger Drive-Thru: W-what do you want? Customer 1: I'd like a Death Burger! Customer 2: With cheese! Drive-Thru: We don't have those Customer 1: A Death Burger with cheese! Customer 2: And fries! Customer 1: And fries! Customer 2: And nachoes... And sausage! Customer 1: C-could you make that a combo? Customer 2: ... And an Egg McMuffin Customer 1: Do you not have a Dea- Drive-Thru: Do you want large fries or jumbo size fries? Customer 1: Do you have a Death Burger or not? Drive-Thru: No, maybe you want a CHEESEburger instead? Customer 1: Baaaaaah. Blast it, just give me a large Cherry Lime-Ade! I'll go somewhere else for a Death Burger...!
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
I've got bad diarrhea, It might be a good idea if I found the bathroom quick before I... oh shit
Submitted by BloodShrine — Apr 18, 2026
Alex. Alex! Alex!! ALEX!!!! This is a slow song. You can do that on the next one Aww... I'm lookin' at you After it's all over And I don't feel quite the same That look in your eye Says you don't want me anymore Even though you are to blame Why oh why did this have to happen Why did you do me this way (Tell me why) You had to leave me all alone (Tell me why) I had to end it all in song (Tell me why) You ran away with my best friend (Tell me why) I still love you I came across an old love letter And here's what you had to say: "Would you please pick up a gallon of milk While you're shopping at the store?" What? That's not it... Ah, here it is You said: "I love you so, you're everything to me I could love no other one" Yeah, right Except for maybe, like I said, my best friend And my brother and my dad, and my other brother, and his best friend, and that guy's brother as well, and that one guy that used to come and mow our lawn every Saturday that had a cool tattoo of a dragon on his shoulder and it was really neat and stuff (Tell me why) You slept with everyone but me (Tell me why) I'm out of words that rhyme with me (Tell me why) You still owe me 3 bucks for that milk (Tell me why) I still love you Why did you leave me alone (why) In the cold, in the darkness (why) Chained like a dog to the wall in the basement "Hey, who turned out the lights?" Why did you hurt me so bad (why) Do you feel no remorse (why) When you broke both of my shins with a crowbar "Ow, my fibula!" Tell me why Tell me why Tell me why Tell me why Tell me why (why) Tell me why (why) Tell me why (why) Tell me why I still love you I still love you Even though you're a bitch I still love you Even though you're a psycho I still love you I still love you Even though you should DIE I still love you Dude, seriously, you need to get a life Okay boy, you can go crazy now
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
One, two, three, four, five, six, seven Seven? I dunno Here we go Tearin' down the road doin' ninety in my tiny little Volkswagen on my way to get a tank of gas I passed a coppa with a radar gun waitin' for a Sucka like me to drive by goin' way too fast I saw the red and blue in my rear view So I pulled my slug bug over to the shoulder of the road He looked me in the nose and said: "Son, do you realize your tires are round?" And I said: "Pluh!" "Uh, what'd you say?" "Stupid... g-guy!" "I said PLUH!" Walkin' down the street in my running shoes Lookin' for a shoestore So that I can find myself parking spot I bumped into a guy that was wearing nothing but his boxers And a cap that said: "I like tater tots." He said somethin' in Latin that I didn't understand And I thought the worst until he pointed at my wrist Then I saw that all he wanted was the time So I looked at my broken watch, and I said: "Pluh!" "I still don't get it" "What the—fucking—" "I said PLUUUHHH!!" What the—? Get that wicky-wack shit out of our music! This is heavy Yup If there ever was a word that you heard so absurd It could take the place of anything that you could say Noun, verb, adverb, statement, question Daytime, night-time, anytime, anyone So remember the next time you forget What you're sayin' in the middle of a sentence Don't strain your brain to remember the words Instead look 'em right in the nose and Tell 'em that the answer is: "PLUUUHH!" "Oh, I get it" "Yeah, now you know!" "I said PLUUUUHHHHH!!!!" "Yeah, that" Pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh Pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh, pluh Yes I said PLUH! PLUH! PLUUHHHH! Satan, Satan (dialogue)
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
I like beer cause it is good I drink beer because I should If there was a song to sing I sing it and beer you bring I drink beer when I am sad Cause the beer, it makes me glad Now there's nothing left to say So let's go drink beer Beer is good Beer is good Beer is good And stuff Beer is good Beer is good Beer is good (Let's go drink some) beer! (beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) When it's warm, it tastes real crappy But cold beer will make me happy When I throw up on the floor I can go and drink some more They say beer will make me dumb It are go good with pizza Now that we have drunk some beer Let's go drive a car Beer is good Beer is good Beer is good And stuff Beer is good Beer is good Beer is good (Let's go drink some) Beer (beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Beer (Beer!) Uh, dude? I think you've had enough No! Let's go drink some beer I am drunk, drunk is me, I am drunk...wheee I am drunk, drunk is me, I am drunk...wheee I am drunk, drunk is me, I am...*burp*
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
I'm depressed So I wrote this song To express Everything that's wrong Like my mother Wouldn't let me go to a Rated R Cool movie At the theater with my friends And I know That you may not think that it's a big deal But you don't understand You would never understand You could never understand You will never understand Cuz I'm singing this melody (And harmony!) And I don't know the words And my life's just so pitiful (And will always be!) Like one big, smelly turd I'm so fat And I'm ugly And I'm dumb And I'm boring I'm a loser and that's all that I'm ever gonna be No use trying; I could never get anywhere And I know That you may not think that it's a big deal But you don't understand You would never understand You could never understand You will never understand Cuz I'm singing this melody (And harmony!) And I don't know the words And my life's just so pitiful (And will always be!) Like one big, smelly turd Die, die, bitch, die! (And stuff) Die, die, slut, die! (At random) Die, die, whore, die! (Who farted?) Die, die, French fry! (I'm hungry) Ooh you would never understand No, you would never understand Cuz I'm singing this melody (And harmony!) And I don't know the words And my life's just so pitiful (And will always be!) Like one big, smelly turd You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand! You would never understand!
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Bitch Oh, I get it You wanna run my life Why don't you stick an antenna up my ass And make me your own satellite You bitch Why the hell you gotta make it so damn tough I could find a cure for cancer But it would not be enough You seem To think That I'm a money tree Since your only big concern is "How much will he spend on me?" That's it I've had it I can't take anymore If you can't see that you're wrong I can show you to the door Tell me what do you want from me (My body, my soul? Is there any relief for me (From you? Hell no.) I won't listen to you Until your mouth is shut And we don't gotta throw down Just 'cause the toilet seat's up I know, that you Suck I know, that you Blow I know, that I'm Fucked I know, that I Can't say no, no, no You've got the nerve To tell me how to drive When you've been in so many wrecks It's amazing you're alive Plus you're hogging all the oxygen Since all you do is talk Give me one good reason not to Make you get out here and walk No, that doesn't mean I think You're overweight I tell you all the time I think that you look great But hey, does it matter With anything I say Since I'm always wrong And didn't do the dishes yesterday Tell me what do you want from me (My body, my soul?) Is there any relief for me (Fuck no) I won't listen to you until your mouth is shut And we don't gotta throw down Just 'cause the toilet seat's up I know, that you, suck I know, that you, blow I know, that I'm, fucked I know, that I can't say no, no, no, no I know that you suck I know that you blow I know that I'm fucked
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
I hate doing laundry I hate doing laundry I hate doing laundry Ah, crap, I gotta do the dishes, too I hate doing dishes I hate doing dishes I hate doing dishes
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Narrator: What would you do for a death burger? Drive-Thru: May I take your order now? Consumer: Hello? I'd like a Death Burger, with cheese, and fries, and nachos Drive-Thru: Is that it? Consumer: Yes just a Death Burger Drive-Thru: So you want a... a hamburger fries and a coke? Consumer: No no no, a Death Burger!
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Dog food Tastes good With cheese
Submitted by Cyberwaste — Apr 18, 2026
*TV in background* -Come on Flute, you need to defeat Heater so we can wish back all of our friends! *Laughing* -Ahh, if only I had more power! -After you I'll destory the planet! *Laughing* -OH NO! Time is running out! Is Heater too hot to handle? Will Flute be able to power up in time? Stay tuned for scenes from the next exciting episode of... LIZARD SPHERE X! -And now this public service announcement *Music plays on TV* -Dude that's my jam! -Don't do drugs! -What the hell? *Laughing* -School is cool! -Ah this is terrible! -This just sucks -Drugs are bad! -Be yourself! *indescribable talking* *Knock on door* -OH YEAH! *indescribable talking* -Who invited you guys? *indescribable talking* -Hey that don't matter what's going on up in hur? -Uhh we're just trying to think of a title for our CD we can't come up with- - Album title!? Ohhh shit! -Damn son we- *indescribable talking* What chu come up with double d? -Man I came up with this idea it's called, www.crackmoneyrecords.cooooooooooom bam boom bam ba boom! -How about no? -Noooooooooo! -I got one yall, how about moon dance? -Oh that's hot! That shit's hot slam! -Uhhh no -Ah fuck that shit yo, when yall mother fuckers gonna put us up on the album? -Yeah man -Cause we crackmoneyrecords.cooooom! -Yeah you mentioned that already. Well We're trying to think of a place to put you but we can't come up with a good spot -Well what about scrotal torment? -Yeah that'd be good! -My balls itch itch up in my testoculies! -We already did that -But we already did that -We already played that one -Oh man damn, well what about I'm in a band to get chicks! Wooooooooooooo! Lord have mercy! -We did that one too -Suck my bicth! Damn son! -Um, um, hey I got an idea, I gotta show you something come here -Well what you got man. WHAT CHU GOT! -wassup? -Check this out -Garden hose down here -GARDEN HOSE?! -It's called go away! *Salms door* *Yelling in backround* -Oh God dude, ugh -Who the hell, who did this? -I swear I didn't say- -Did you call them?
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
I can feel you in my heart Even though we drift apart With those words you spoke to me Though I always disagree And I listen To the sound of Your sweet voice cause you won't shut up Now I'm finished Let me call you A taxi (woah o yeah, woah oh) I don't feel That I'm feeling Your feelings About these feelings that you feel (woah romance) And you know that I love you When we're fuckin' Cause orgasm equals love All my friends smile and they chuckle At pictures of your bear moose knuckle Please don't feel like you're a slut When I'm peeing in your butt And I love to donkey punch you After I poop on your sheets And I do it cause you love me And I love you (awwww) (woah oh yeah, woah some more) I don't feel That I'm feeling Your feelings About these feelings that you feel (woa hack wheeze) And I love you When you show me Your sweet boobies Cause orgasm equals love Take it Joshy Woh oh oh oh oh oh oh Aaagghhh! That was terrible I don't feel That I'm feeling Your feelings About these feelings that you feel You know what.. fuck this! I'm out of here! Let's get married And have babies Just kidding Cause orgasm equals love Cause erections equals love Cause ejaculation equals love Cause deep throating blowjobs equal love Cause salad tossing equals love Double penetration equals love Anal kidney punching equals love Cause dirty sanchez's equal love Cause Cleveland steamers equal love Cause tying you up to my bed and gagging you with your own panties and sticking my wiener in between your boobies and cumming all over your chin equals love This song ain't gettin' on the radio any time soon Good job. Looks like we finally put the boy to sleep with our slow songs. Somebody wake him up will you OK
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Morning sleepy head! Time to get up! I said It's time to get up! Rise and shine It's a whole new day full of opportunities and possibilities I said Wake up Touch that snooze button And I'll rip off your Ear Yeah, that's it, your ear! Wake up (I don't wanna get up) I said wake Up (I don't wanna get up) Come on, wake up (I don't wanna get up) I said Wake up (I don't wanna get up) You better get up You better get up You better get up before I starting singing you a Song Alright, alright, I'm Up, I'm Up. Just please stop singing man you sing like shit!
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
Sick of being a loser Turned down at every turn Tired of being rejected I'm the king of crash and burn What am I gonna do now I need a little plan Wait, I bet they would want me With a microphone in hand 'Cause I'm sick of this rejection Gotta get me some affection If I wanna score I gotta upgrade my image So I'll dub myself a singer Give the rules a middle finger Say I do it for the music Not the money Though that's true I know that... All I want is chicks All he wants is chicks All they want it chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks Chicks Boobs Yeah, all we want is A little booty Look at me in the spotlight Sweat glistens off my brow Take my shirt off and show off Time to flaunt my physique now Look at the girls all screaming With their faces turning red Know that each look I give them Makes them want to give me... heh heh Well I know they'll like me better Than that loser Eddie Vetter Or Aaron Lewis 'cause I know I'm better looking And I wish my crush from high school Saw me now and feels like a fool 'cause I asked her out A hundred times She said, "NO!" Her loss, still I know All I want is chicks All he wants is chicks All they want it chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks All we want is chicks Chicks Boobs Yeah all we want is A little booty (dialogue)
Submitted by Iron_Wraith — Feb 22, 2026
(dialogue) Well you see I wanna sell a million records But my music sucks So what am I to do? They say an artist is appreciated after he's dead I have no talent but I bet that it's still true The lyrics all suck and The chords are too funky We're on a major label 'Cause we're just plain lucky We sold 4 albums To our own mothers We have a few supporters But there aren't many others What if I could live If they all would think I'm dead Oh just what if I could have me a cake And eat it too I'd be set for life No more struggles no more strife Let the money do the talking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man Kill myself And all our record sales will shoot up Like an addict Or that poser Eminem Make it a mystery And let them spot me just like Elvis It wouldn't matter 'Cause I'd still be dead to them I'd simply sit back in A house all secluded Out in the forest Self sufficient, pool included Let my name take the place of Fred Durst I could have it all If my label doesn't kill me first What if I could live If they all would think I'm dead Oh just what if I could have me a cake And eat it too I'd be set for life No more struggles no more strife Let the money do the talking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man What if I could live If they all would think I'm dead Oh just what if I could have me a cake And eat it too I'd be set for life No more struggles no more strife Let the money do the talking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man walking I'm a dead man I'm a, I'm a, I'm a I'm a dead man walking I'm a, I'm a, I'm a I'm a dead man walking, ah Dead man walking
Submitted by Immortal — Feb 22, 2026
Alright, motherfuckers! It's time to go old school! So put on your thinking caps and get ready to fuck shit up! A, B, C, D, E, F, G H, I, J, K, L M N O P Q R S, T U V W X, Y and Z Now I know, my A, B, C's Next time won't You sing with me 0, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 A, B, C, D, E, F, G H, I, J, K, L M N O P Q R S, T U V W X, Y and Z
Submitted by Immortal — Feb 22, 2026
I know I promised I'd write you a love song But instead I just wrote you a drunk song Because love is pathetic But seventy proof is no less than poetic You look your best when my vision is blurry That's not what I meant I can't keep from slurring Because love is emetic But not if you bought me a shot and I hit it Drink 'till you're crazy Dance 'till you're sick Take off your bra Give it to the 'stick Drink 'till your're crazy Dance 'till you're sick Acknowledge the dumb Give it to the 'stick I can't see, now I have to pee And I can't count to three But I can count to Jagermeister Yeah Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug my Jagermeister Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug my Jagermeister Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug, chug Chug, chug my Jagermeister Whew Drink 'till you're crazy Dance 'till you're sick Take off your bra Give it to the 'stick Drink 'till you're crazy Dance 'till you're sick Acknowledge the dumb Give in to the 'stick
Submitted by Immortal — Feb 22, 2026