Adulting

I don't wanna adult today Things to fix Bills to pay I just wanna stay in bed Playing video games But instead... I gotta get up Go to work Put on my pants Iron my shirt Warm up my car Did I get gas? Sit in traffic This jerk won't let me pass I've had enough adulting No more being grown up for me Let the bills pile up to the ceiling (in PJ's) Playing Super Mario 3 No I can't do that I gotta do the thing (But I don't wanna do the thing) But you gotta do the thing (I'm not gonna do the thing!) Adulting is suffering And suffering is not for me Adulting has got to be The purest form of misery I don't wanna do stuff Doing stuff is stupid A meaningless existence Doing stuff to live To have to do more stuff You must renew your license plate Utilities need to be paid Stop I need a break from the stress Taxes overdue Car needs an emissions test I can't take it anymore Filthy bathroom floor And I gotta go to the store Going to the store is such a bore... Paying bills has no thrills! Putting on pants is a torturous dance Being an adult is the worst kind of cult I'm done with adulting No more being grown up for me I'm gonna call off work Third day in a row Eatin' chicken strips Playin' Battletoads I'm done with adulting No more responsibility I'm out of food and money But I gotta finish season 3 And they fired me I gotta find a job I don't wanna get a job But you gotta get a job I don't want another job Spruce up your resume I hate job hunting Shave your beard No Adulting is suffering And suffering is not for me Adulting has got to be The purest form of misery I don't wanna job hunt Job hunting is stupid A meaningless existence Work a job to live To have to work a job I refuse to get a job Or do adulting stuff I'd rather... Erect a couch-cushion fortress Have a staring contest with my cat Sergeant Snuggles Re-watch all 121 episodes of "Lost" Still don't get it Fall asleep with the lights on Eat ramen straight out of the pack Let the dishes attract fruit flies Make a YouTube page for Sergeant Snuggles Look, Sergeant Snuggles, a comment! *meow* Why are you making videos of your cat? Aren't you unemployed? *hiss* I've had it Don't you dare judge me Been told since birth To follow my dreams You're looking at it I'm living the dream The lifetime pursuit of Absolutely nothing The pursuit of nothing The pursuit of nothing I don't wanna human today No more brushing teeth Let them decay Haven't showered in over a week I don't even Wanna think Just leave me here in bed Pull the covers over my head Let the world think I'm dead 'Cause I'm gonna... *snore* I'm finished with adulting No more being grown up for me Sergeant Snuggles' YouTube page Has a billion views So I'm gettin' paid Give up on adulting You just gotta follow your dreams Don't need a job Or any skills When your kitty cat Can pay the bills Sergeant Snuggles Passive income

Submitted by Immortal — Feb 22, 2026