Return to the Kingdom of Fife
Initiating interdimensional subspace replay Target year 1022 Begin transmission
Submitted by SerpentEve — Feb 06, 2026
Welcome, doomed traveler, into a forsaken realm of nuclear chaos... welcome to Imperium Dundaxia! Nothing remains now but chaos and death Once blue skies now rage bloody red Blasted and crushed, to rubble and dust The kingdom lies in waste, vanquished and dead The evil wizard has doomed us all Imperium Dundaxia Decades have passed in the Kingdom of Fife The end of the world has begun Robots and goblins are roaming the land The peasant folk cower and run My father died in the war of Dundee By magical spells I was saved Hidden for years in a castle in space I swore to rise again, to take my revenge This is a lament for Dundee Song for the brave heroes Who died on their hands and knees In a battle once foretold, long ago Now lost to the ancient cosmic Force of nuclear fire Flames! Burning with fury Rage! My only desire Is to bring death, pain and destruction Unto the wizard of ire Fight! Raise up the hammer Quest! Forevermore Into a land lost to the darkness Dundax! Irae! And out from the toxic shadows of the Dundaxian wasteland, came forth the cloned sorcerer on a diabolical quest in the name of his ice-bound progenitor... Chaos! Evil! A thousand plagues and more would be unleashed upon the world, and all would once again kneel before the immortal Zargothrax! Goblins! Agents of doom Masters of evil that come from the moon Robots! Servants of steel Their lasers so real you shall feel Wizard! Frozen in tomb His nuclear clone made Dundee go kaboom But all is not lost just as long as I stand The forces of justice still wander these lands I swear by the hammer that I will defy The armies of chaos will die! Flames! Burning with fury Rage! My only desire Is to bring death, pain and destruction Unto the wizard of ire Fight! Raise up the hammer Quest! Forevermore Into a land lost to the darkness My name is Angus McFife My hammer will take your life Dundax! Irae!
Submitted by Corpse Grinder — Apr 26, 2025
Cruisin' down the highway powered by hoots 1000 miles per hour that electrocute Pedal to the metal, feel the surge It's the invocation of the Thaumaturge Across the endless light years Your heroes have returned On nuclear powered motorbikes The enemies of Unst will burn Wasteland warrior hoots patrol Fighting goblins everywhere we go Wasteland warrior hoots patrol With the hammer and axe Prepare to attack! We're the Wasteland warrior hoots patrol Riding on through the ice and the snow Wasteland warrior hoots patrol When a battle is Fight We'll be there at the speed of light! You might also like Brothers of Crail Gloryhammer Imperium Dundaxia Gloryhammer Maleficus Geminus (Colossus Matrix 38B - Ultimate Invocation of the Binary Thaumaturge) Gloryhammer [Post-Chorus] Swords! Hammers! Battleaxe! (Wasteland warrior hoots patrol) White hot thunder beneath my feet Goblins battling in the streets With armor of wolf and leather boots The only law is the law of hoots The kingdom lies in ruins Auchtermuchty is no more Toxic dragons fly across A wasteland made from nuclear war But there's a lone survivor Questing far across the land He is the mighty Hootsman Battleaxe is in his hand Wasteland warrior hoots patrol Fighting goblins everywhere we go Wasteland warrior hoots patrol With the hammer and axe, prepare to attack! We're the wasteland warrior hoots patrol Riding on through the ice and the snow Wasteland warrior hoots patrol When a battle is Fight We'll be there at the speed of light! Alright, you bunch of nuclear goblins, listen up! My name is the Hootsman, and this wasteland belongs to me Now, I'm gonna give you to the count of three To get your good for nothing goblonic asses outta here Or you're gonna taste the power of hoots! Wasteland warrior hoots patrol Fighting goblins everywhere we go Wasteland warrior hoots patrol Fighting goblins everywhere we go Wasteland warrior hoots patrol With the hammer and axe Prepare to attack! We're the wasteland warrior hoots patrol Riding on through the ice and the snow Wasteland warrior hoots patrol When a battle is Fight We'll be there at the speed of light! Swords! Hammers! Battleaxe! (Wasteland warrior hoots patrol) Hoots!
Submitted by Cyberwaste — Apr 26, 2025
Woah-oh-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae Join us in our fortress where the ocean meets the land A secret ancient brotherhood with laser sword in hand Guardians of technology from centuries gone by Riding on an eagle through apocalyptic skies Grandmaster Proletius He's the mightiest hero Woah-oh-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae (Raise your sword to the sky and say!) Woah-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae ('Cause we! Are the Brotherhood of Crail!) Long ago we served the king but now we stand alone We'll fight to save the land of Crail with blood and steel and bone Keepers of the sorcerer now trapped inside of ice Never shall his reign of terror overcome the Knights Our powerful robots Will protect us from chaos Woah-oh-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae (Raise your sword to the sky and say!) Woah-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae ('Cause we! Are the Brotherhood of Crail!) Deformed goblins of the wasteland! You have proven yourselves to be unworthy of our technology, indeed! Now, prepare to face the might of the Brotherhood of Crail! We'll fight together Proudly we will stand The evil wizard Zargothrax will never rule this land Upon our eagles Riding in the sky The Brotherhood of Crail will never die! Woah-oh-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae (Raise your sword to the sky and say!) Woah-oh in the decimated wastelands of Crail (Brothers of Crail! To Robots We Hail!) Woah-oh-oh where the brotherhood rides in alis aquilae ('Cause we are the Brotherhood Hail to the Brotherhood We are the Brotherhood of Crail)
Submitted by Morgoth — Apr 26, 2025
I will fight for the light In the name of Fife Eternal To defend the realm that lies Ablaze with black fire Questing through an ancient land my father used to rule Now overrun by toxic fiends and goblins minuscule I am brave prince Angus, the second of my name To reclaim the throne of Fife shall be my only aim To triumph in the ultimate war We must stand together once more I will fight for the light In the name of Fife Eternal To defend the realm that lies Ablaze with black fire On a quest for the crown To restore the land's renown I will fight from the Clyde to the Tay I'm fighting every day From the north - barbarian! The Hootsman is his name He's sure to join my noble fight in search of epic fame From the east Proletius the grandmaster of Crail Long ago he swore an oath - now once again he'll hail And from a mountain far to the south A hermit heeds the call (Memories of nuclear submarines) Now Ralathor is back by my side The wizard clone soon will fall! I will fight for the light In the name of Fife Eternal To defend the realm that lies Ablaze with black fire On a quest for the crown To restore the land's renown I will fight from the Clyde to the Tay Let's battle today! Long ago, it was told That a mighty Laserblaster Lies inside a citadel now lost to the Starlords You must quest, far away Through the ancient Dwarven caves And into the legendary Kingdom of Strathclyde I will fight for the light In the name of Fife Eternal To defend the realm that lies Ablaze with black fire On a quest for the crown To restore the land's renown I will fight from the Clyde to the Tay I'm fighting every day
Submitted by Immortal — Apr 26, 2025
Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde Black Knight of the Dwarven Caverns We must find the hidden way By the sword of the Lord of the Horde Questing to the caverns, beneath the ancient ruins of Dundee (Lost for centuries before the fall of Cowdenbeath) Nuclear devastation, and toxic laser slime surrounding me Warriors take heed! Mighty Ser Proletius is guiding us below atomic stars (Epic paladin, he battles for the powersteel) Ralathor behind me, we stеp inside the tunnels to thе dark No turning back! Led by ancestral light The fire burning deep in my heart To revive lost Kingdom of Fife The Sword must ignite my path! Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde Black Knight of the Dwarven Caverns We must find the hidden way By the sword of the Lord of the Goblin Horde Cosmic glyphs and sigils burning black (Ancient symbols from the star lords of eternity) Laser horses cry for homeland lost to destiny (Laser horse of Kirriemuir) The cavern shakes with ancient crystal fires, so dire A goblin approaches from the shadowy murk - beware! I see him there! If his sword should strike me, mighty heroes are defeat Evil Wizards rewrite history But the force of my Holy Hammer, will rage through time This battle for our destiny is mine! Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde Black Knight of the Dwarven Caverns We must find the hidden way By the sword of the Lord of the Goblin Horde, prepare for war Mighty prince, as decreed by the ancient code of goblins I shall yield the secret of this blade only when bested in single combat! But, know this! The path can only be revealed If you take its knowledge to the grave! Now, enough chatter... prepare for battle! En Guarde! Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde Black Knight of the Dwarven Caverns We must find the hidden way By the sword of the Lord of the Goblin Horde Sword Lord of the Goblin Horde Black Knight of the Dwarven Caverns We must find the hidden way By the sword of the Lord of the Goblin Horde
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Apr 26, 2025
Long ago in times of war, men spoke of an artifact Built by gods from worlds unknown and wielded by kings With the blaster in my hands Lord Zargothrax would surely yield Goblin armies run away in fear We must find it here! For the Kingdom of Space Dundee For the powerful weapon that I seek In the ashes of nuclear war Remember the things we are fighting for For the land where the dragon flies Far across the enchanted sapphire sky I've seen it inside of my dreams The Vorpal Laserblaster of Pittenweem Weapon borne of mystic times, a fragment of destiny Charged with light from an ancient star and forged from pure steel! He who wields dark matter cannon becomes one with the power I must quest far and wide until it is mine - I'll quest for all time! For the Kingdom of Space Dundee For the powerful weapon that I seek In the ashes of nuclear war Remember the things we are fighting for For the land where the dragon flies Far across the enchanted sapphire sky I've seen it inside of my dreams The Vorpal Laserblaster of Pittenweem Ride mighty warriors, across the plains of East Kilbride Pass the icy chasms to the mountains of Strathclyde There inside a citadel, where a robot guards the way You will find the Blaster, to smite your foes this day For the Kingdom of Space Dundee For the powerful weapon that I seek In the ashes of nuclear war The tales of our glory will live evermore Now the chest is before my eyes But inside there is emptiness and lies By the wizard I've been deceived The Vorpal Laserblaster of Pittenweem Pathetic mortal scum! Your quest was in vain, and your realm is doomed... For the Vorpal Laserblaster of Pittenweem is now in the hands of the immortal Zargothrax!
Submitted by VladTheImpaler666 — Apr 26, 2025
Dundee! Dundee! Irax! Harfatum! Vorpus! Telum! Nihil! Septomin! Dundee! Dundee! Colossus! Matrix 38B! Riding 'cross the terrorzone With the blaster in his hand An unholy quest to break the tomb Of the frozen wizard Slashing through the Brotherhood The pathetic Knights of Crail Now the secrets of the gods are mine They will yield to me! Far away inside the ancient citadel of Crail I know a goblin waits for me Through the gates now strewn with blood and guts and bits of brain I know a goblin waits for me Dark wizard, Angus comes for thee Heroes of the wasteland, prepare for final fight The nuclear clone of Zargothrax cannot escape this night He wields the laser blaster, our quest may yet be doomed Unless we seek the Robot Prince of Mighty Auchtertool With eyes ablaze with crimson fire And great boronic wings His armor wrought from power steel Heir of the mecha-king Heroes charge with vengeance Unicorns are in pursuit But with the power of robot might They'll answer now to Hoots Robot Prince of Auchtertool Over thy robot kingdom rule Electronic lord of war Destined to reign forever more Robot Prince of Auchtertool Over thy robot kingdom rule Electronic lord of war Destined to reign forever more Back inside the citadel The containment zone ahead Override the cryogenic seals Demonic power! No-one left to stop me now My progenitor arise Now the land of Fife will kneel before Mighty double wizard Zargothrax! Warning... containment seals breached... cryogenic stasis system overload... liquid ice prison failure imminent... warning... warning... warning... Double! Wizard! Sorcerus! Geminus! Diabolica Duplicatus! Sorcerus! Geminus! Diabolica Ultimae! After decades of torment, dark fortune smiles my way My progeny hath served me well, his reward shall be death's citadel Now, with the knife and the blaster We'll conjoin ourselves at the brain Powerless Prince of Fife, we'll now take your life Let you and your kin burn in HELL! Dundee! Dundee! Robot! Viator! Dundee! Vortex! Noctem! Iudicium! At last! By the machinations of my clone, I am free from the shackles of frozen slumber! After countless aeons of scheming across multiple dimensions, the grand cosmic plan of Zargothrax will now come to fruition! The chronological imperative will be eradicated... by the power of two wizards you shall perish! Slaves of the armies of Angus Warriors who yearn to be free I will liberate you from the chains of your life Your souls now belong to me Rise as a creature of darkness Rise as an undead machine In the name of the Sorcerer Zargothrax Vanquish the paleocene And lo! The time for reckoning is at hand! Prince Angus, your reign ends today! Prepare to die! Begone, foul servants of chaos! I swear by the blood of the sword in my veins, I will never be defeat! For the Eternal Glory of Dundee! Robot Prince of Auchtertool Over thy robot kingdom rule Electronic lord of war Destined to reign forever more Knife of evil is too great Prince of the robots meets his fate Auchtertool no longer fight Killed by the wizard lord this night Now the ultimate battle begins Angus is fighting the sorcerous twins There is no chance for our hero to win Wielding the hammer of glory so high Knife made of evil make threaten to die Dark laser blaster shoot death in the sky Suddenly the heavens cry Behold, creatures of Earth! By your foolish meddling with the 3 artifacts of power, you have summoned forth the Starlords of Eternity! These weapons are not your playthings to be trifled with... and so for your impudent acts, your world shall be eradicated! Except for you, brave prince... join us, for your destiny awaits beyond the outer reaches of the galaxy! The hammer the knife and the blaster collide Starlords of heaven return from the skies Making the wizards and warriors die Only Prince Angus is spared from this doom Starlords beseech him to quest to the moon They have revealed him a new destiny Far across the endless galaxy By the Holy Flaming Hammer of Unholy Cosmic Frost I will voyage 'cross the Multiverse to fight for what was lost From this realm of nuclear chaos, to a world beyond the stars I will quest forever onwards, so far I will wield the Holy Hammer of Flame Unholy cosmic frost! Ecce Princeps Dundonensis Imperator Ascendit In Astra Eterna!
Submitted by Cyberwaste — Apr 26, 2025